Musings at 50

The first time I thought about doing a personal retreat I thought it sounded extravagant, self-indulgent, and something people do because they weren't busy enough in their lives. Now, at 50, I find myself needing some time to regroup - my lifestyle, my patterns, the way I walk through life is not serving me - in fact, I believe it is killing me. I know that for some of you, if you know me and you are reading this - your first thought is, don't be so melodramatic Tracy. If you don't know me - then you may be thinking what is killing you? Where do I begin? I spend a lot of time in my head - thinking about the past and the future. I feel like I am always anxious and fearful - trying to anticipate what is next, because of this my body feels like it is always in fight/flight/freeze/submit. My doctor said - while you are healthy Tracy (by the numbers - my cholesterol, my heart rate, etc) - this overactive adrenal situation will cause a heart attack. I cannot seem to shut it off. ...