New Year's Resolutions 12/29/2020

 

Where do you stand on resolutions? I have been making them for quite a long time - it used to be a journal entry - or sometimes it was a list on a random piece of paper or on a page of my calendar or planner. Then, Facebook has memorialized my resolutions since 2009. I used to keep the list to about 5 or 10 - people had their opinions about it - how many do you actually accomplish? What do you tell yourself if you do not do them? Call them goals, accomplishments, resolutions or intentions - I love this ritual. I love I have reoccurring themes. I read Gretchen Rubin's book The Happiness Project back in 2012 and inspired by the Happiness Project I decided to break it down by having one theme or focus a month. That only lasted until 2013 and I am not sure how successful I was. The thing is - I actually enjoy setting my sights on something - a goal, an intention, a resolution - a contract between me and me. The flip side can be when I disappoint myself...the negative self talk and feeling less than because I did not accomplish something that I set out to do. Most of the time this has been a positive experience for me. I listened to a podcast that had you list 16 in 2016 - and it was part to-do list and part resolution or intention setting. It was fun (for me who loves to check items off a list) but having so many things to accomplish would get me down on occasion. The goal though was to pick things you have been meaning to do - so one was visit the beach once a month (and who doesn't love the beach). It could be something even more simple like - buy a black belt that goes with everything. We actually got one of those robot vacuums and never really used it and so one year it was get it programmed and use it - or get rid of it. Turns out our combo hardwood/rug floors and oddly shaped furniture gave the robot vacuum a run for its money and if it wasn't stuck under the dining room table it would get snuggled into the couch and could not escape - we got rid of it. I have promised to be nicer to my husband - several years running, and I have vowed to lose weight, spend less, drink more water, read more, and the list goes on. But, whatever I decide to write down. I keep it in my mind all year long. I refer to it. I sometimes edit it - because sometimes I cannot foresee what will be happening as the year unfolds. I also started picking a word of the year - something to focus on - to refer back to and remind myself of what I was thinking those last weeks of the previous year.

This ritual comes with both the good and the bad - and I LOVE it. I will continue to do it. Last year I made it a little more attainable (so I thought) - kept the words simple and my intent was to build for success rather than set the bar too high. Slow down, eat more veggies, spend quality time with Tim, be in nature, invite stillness, savor your food...these are the things I came up with last year - and my word for the year was Patience. Patience - ooh, that word kept coming all year long. If 2020 wasn't my test of patience, I do not know what was...every time I felt myself resist what was happening - the more time indoors, the more time with my husband, the cancellation of plans, the working from home, not leaving my house or neighborhood for days, my impatience at work with what was happening to me - to my employees, to the office, to my home, to myself...I could look at the words on my upstairs door - or my planner, or on a post-it and remind myself - oh yeah, 2020 is all about Patience.  Now that it is the end of the year - have I mastered it? No, not even close - but did I sit with it, play with it, be curious about it, try it on? Absolutely.

What will 2021 hold? - I'm already thinking about it, meditating, journaling, considering what is it that I need to consider, be curious about, play with, wrestle with in 2021?

I spent some time during Solstice - thinking about this - wondering what this year will bring - my notes were - 

Be Present

Be Brave

Transform

You Matter

But sometimes it isn't what rises first that makes the cut - so, I will sit and listen. I look forward to sitting down and seeing what comes up on January 1, 2021.